Recently I stepped on my ‘magical’ scales for the first time since the Christmas holidays. (I call them this because they tell you your muscle percentage and your fat percentage) I was already feeling anxious about it, and just figured I’d get it over and done with. Although my core values reflect that your weight does not define your worth, that does not mean that I can think like this permanently. I too grew up in this society, which enforces that being lighter and smaller is an essential quality in order to be worthy. Growing up in this constant battle can take its’ toll, and although you should be mindful and try your best to remind yourself that that is not the case, it’s okay to sometimes fall into the traps, as long as you pick yourself back up and remind yourself that you are fantastic and beautiful regardless.
Anyway, I stepped on the scale, and low and behold, regardless of me training, intuitively eating and being in a good place physically, I had put on a significant amount of weight. As you can imagine, a lot of the time, a first instinct is to feel panicked, upset and disappointed. My brain immediately went to feel the negative emotions, and my ED thoughts began to resurface. I took a few days to breathe, and work through the thoughts, and dispel them.
I reminded myself of all the positives that had come from weight gain, I could lift heavier, I had gained more muscle mass and in turn I could eat more. I am nourishing myself and feeling happier for it. I’m not feeling hungry constantly or punishing myself. I am exercising because I love it and enjoy it and feel good when I do it. I am healthier in mind and body for putting on weight. I would not take it back. I now refer to any weight gain as ‘GAINSSSSSS.’
The point of this really is to point out that weight gain doesn’t have to be viewed as and talked about in a negative light all the time, it is a neutral thing. It happens, to everyone. But it can also be a positive thing, and I think that seeing the positives and practicing gratitude around it, is so incredibly important in order to be closer to feeling happy within yourself and your body.
Yes, societies conditioning is hard, and it’s okay to ‘fail’ at feeling happy within yourself sometimes, but as long as you encourage yourself to pick yourself back up and remind yourself of your worth, you’re doing great.
Thepositivemindsbody 